If you eat three meals a day, you are responsible for coming up with 1,095 meals a year. And if you have a partner and/or kids, that number only multiplies. Even if you just think about dinner, that’s 365 meals per person per year (366 on a leap year!).
When I was in college, I was shellshocked by the reality that I had to figure out what to eat every single day. I was blessed with a mom (hi mom, I know you’re reading this!) who cooked delicious homemade meals nearly every day of my childhood and adolescence. How did she do this for a family of 4 for over 18 years? I have no idea, but I’m impressed and grateful.
As I went out on my own, I realized I likely needed a different approach. Being AuDHD, executive functioning like meal planning doesn’t always come naturally to me. Often, it comes in waves. Some weeks I’m on top of it, grocery shopping and cooking right on schedule; others, I forget to grocery shop entirely and don’t cook at all, struggling to think of what I could possibly eat.
I used to beat myself up about this, feeling shame for ordering takeout several days in a row or eating the same thing over and over again, but now, I just let myself ride the wave and embrace it. Now, I understand that when I’m tired, stressed, or overwhelmed, my brain is wired to crave foods that give me dopamine and meet my sensory preferences (spicy, creamy, bold flavors). Understanding my traits around food and taste helps me anticipate my needs based on how busy I’m going to be, how much work I have to do, or even if I have a lot of social events that week, I can embrace my unique mealtime style and make it work for me and let go of the pressure.
Here are a few ways to design your mealtimes to work for you, leaving shame out of it altogether.
Novelty Menu Planning
Sometimes even if we have a fridge stocked full of food, it may not feel like the “right” food for what we are craving. If you aren’t feeling it, just freeze before it expires and pop over to the grocery store to pick up something that feels exciting to you. Plus, who doesn’t love the dopamine hit of shopping for ingredients for a dish you’re excited about and going home right away to cook it? Sometimes that is the way!
Modular Grocery Shopping
Instead of shopping for specific recipes, buy meats or fish you can freeze and easily defrost as you’re craving them. Buy frozen veggies that are easy to cook and taste fresh. Stock your pantry with dry basics like rice and pasta and your favorite tastebud-provoking, stimming-friendly, dopamine-inducing seasonings and sauces. And keep your favorite condiments on hand, too. Then whatever you’re craving, whenever you’re craving it, you can whip it up without having to plan ahead.
Eat On Repeat
Do you have a favorite food that you could eat every single day? Don’t be afraid to stock up on your faves and eat them until something else catches your eye, nose, mouth… then it’s fine to be onto the next. Rather than fight the recurrence or try to integrate the variety, embrace the repeat. What’s important is that you are eating and enjoying it.
Make A Snack Plate
If coming up with full-on meals is too intimidating, try buying a bunch of snacks you enjoy and making snack plates instead. I love buying cheese, crackers, fruit, chocolate, chips, dip, hummus, carrots, berries, or whatever I’m feeling that week and mixing and matching them all to make little snack plates that are delicious, nutritious, easy to pick at throughout the day, and beautiful to look at. And bonus points if you have a favorite plate to arrange your snacks on for a perfect vizzy stim moment.
Vizzy Stim With Tableware
If you’re a visually sensitive person, lean into your vizzy stims and find tableware that makes you feel excited to use it. Maybe it’s a ceramic plate from your favorite artist or a colorful mug or the perfect fork and spoon. The environment you create for eating dinner influences your experience, so design it to be stimulating and exciting to you!
Outsource
If you’re like me and tend to order takeout or delivery a few times a week (especially during those busy weeks!), just budget for it and embrace it. Build it into your routine, leave the shame out the door, and enjoy it. Read more about how we like to outsource here.
